Autism… great

Hello non existent reader ,I’m not going to sugar coat it being diagnosed was probably the single most traumatic experience in my life. I’m not going to ramble on about how I overcame it and how it makes me a better person because that’s what people always hear isn’t it? They get so defensive the don’t like to mention just how restrictive it can be at times .No I wouldn’t change it but it needs to be recognised that even on the mild end of the spectrum its no walk in the park. Here are my list of five things about ASD I wish would go burn… I promise I’m not an arsonist.

1 The it  all makes sense now

Possibly the most patronising thing you can do .When I told people they looked at me as if all the sudden there was a balance in the universe the stars were aligned it all made sense now they were some almighty all knowing being  their eyes filled with wisdom and the jigsaw hade come together they could finally stick me into a box with a neatly tied ribbon there you go that’s your label . Don’t get me started on the bombardment after this ..So that’s why you do that .You know what this makes a lot of sense. Omg I’m so glad you have it makes you you .So that’s why your so introverted. So that’s why you have( insert perfectly normal personality trait that occurs out side of asd here) .The best reaction I’ve ever got was my friend accidentally said something in front of my other friend he said” Rose are you autistic?” I said “Yes but I don’t tell people because I want to be a person not a label” and he just said” Ok “I could’ve hugged him that day to this day it just makes me want to cry its all I ever wanted to hear . In summary were not maths problems we don’t need solving thank you very much.

2 The me too

The second most infuriating thing you can do is start talking about that time you almost had a panic attack and I don’t like people in my personal space too.Yes these are valid experiences and  you may have really had a panic attack and you might be claustrophobic but most of the time these stories are wildly exaggerated by people who don’t know our struggle. I hope I don’t sound full of my self and if I do please let my know oh so non existent reader but these stories are utterly infuriating especially if it comes with a well I did it so you can attitude for instance my” friend ” she can be erm  err  Michelle said I hate it when people touch me in crowded places I said oh me too and she went yeah well I really don’t like it -one thing to note about Michelle is every thing is a competition- and she talked about how annoyed she was and every time I said something there was a oh me too I finally gave up .I turned round and said” Do you swing at people when they wont stop touching you?!” This was promptly followed with what I like to call the” why do you exist look” and then silence because for once in her bratty little life she couldn’t beat me over something that ISNT EVEN A COMPETETITION.

3 The my cousin has that

this applies to any relative you’ve met one person with asd you’ve met one person with asd.Its called autism SPECTRUM disorder because there is A SPECTRUM of symptoms and diagnosises (yes I know that’s not a word.) enough said.

4 oh the stereotypes

5 things you should never ask /say to an autistic person unless you want the dirtiest death stare of your life:

1.So do you like science and maths then?  I don’t know is my name Sheldon Cooper I’m sorry I’ve let the entirety of autism down I am the WORST at maths.

2. So what’s your obsession? were can hold a conversation with out talking about it you know normal people have interests too .

3 Talking of interests ,Do you like trains? I’ve personally never got this one  but many people have but if anyone ever asks me it they have 3 seconds to run

4 But your so normal . this one isn’t too offensive but please just go home.

5 this one is from the adults so how does that make you feel / so how are you going cope with this? I take back what I said earlier this is the most patronising thing I have a HIGH FUNCTIONING disorder and you bout to treat me like I’m six. I’m going to stop now because if I don’t ill still be writing this well into they year 3000. I grt your trying to help but its the inflection that ckmes with it that just sends me over the edge

5 The isolation of it in general

Its not fun when society treats you like a basket case. Its not fun being living with what is basically ocd meets anxiety with slight adhd and a possible visit from depression. The perfect analogy I have for this is every one but you speaks a different language each person has there own some are similar some are not and every time you have every thing mapped out the little gits switch .Its not fun distancing yourself from everyone yet you do it anyway.

sorry to end on a sad tone not that I think anyone will read it I reckon over time this will become more of an internet journal sorry for the long post ill be uploading a much lighter post tomorrow goodbye non existent reader  -rose x

 

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